104 | Betrayal Trauma, Relationship Boundaries, and Using Parts Work to Heal with Roxanne Kennedy Granata

Listen to Betrayal Trauma, Relationship Boundaries, and Using Parts Work to Heal with Roxanne Kennedy Granata on: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Your player of choice

I’m honored to be joined by my inspiring, powerhouse friend, Roxanne Granata, for today’s episode!

Roxanne and I are a part of the More Mastermind, and I’ve come to believe that it’s never accidental when people come into our lives. Soo much of what I’ve been feeling and speaking about recently, Roxanne has been able to help me in naming, and just gain more clarity around. Roxanne is an Empowered Relationships Coach who specializes in healing the nervous system through Internal Family Systems (IFS – also known as Partswork) and Somatics. Her journey began a little over a decade ago when she experienced betrayal trauma with her now ex-husband, and his hidden addiction to pornography. This path was very painful and made her question herself (and even her sanity) along the way. Ultimately, it led her to experience healing that she didn’t know was possible, a newfound purpose and passion, becoming a published author, and even remarriage.

In today’s episode, Roxanne and I discuss betrayal trauma, relationship boundaries, and using parts work to heal. While it can feel so unnatural (and honestly pretty scary), to set boundaries with those around us, it actually shows how much we value ourselves + the other person. Even though we can’t control the outcome after this happens, we can choose to work on ourselves, using tools like talk therapy and EMDR (eye movement desensitization and reprocessing), a unique type of therapy that digs deep into our ‘emotional roots’. Something that Roxanne specializes in is Partswork (IFS), a powerful modality that allows us to find and actually ‘talk’ to specific parts of ourselves that experienced past trauma. When we’ve gained awareness and are super intentional about this work that we’re doing, not only are we healing ourselves, but our kids, and future generations to come as well.

Roxanne is now on the other side, living out her passion, and has fully embraced the woman she is meant to be. As women, we NEED to be succeeding and thriving; we have so much to give, and we should never feel like we need to play small, just to accommodate those around us who aren’t willing to put in the work. Whether you’ve experienced betrayal trauma, boundary struggles, imposter syndrome, or something else, start focusing on healing YOU, because you are worth doing so. After all..healed women heal the world!

For Roxanne Kennedy Granata, what started out as needing to survive betrayal trauma and infidelity, turned into so much growth and knowledge of what goes on in our deep inner world of emotions. The things that keep us stuck and not knowing what to do or how to do it has become Roxanne’s passion and focus in helping others find their peace and healing. Her expertise in working with individuals suffering from betrayal trauma has expanded to helping all who are tired of feeling stuck personally, relationally, and in their careers. 

Roxanne is the Author of the book “Cutting Ties- Healing Betrayal Trauma as the Spouse of an Addict”, Creator of the “Choose In Podcast”, and is Trauma informed Certified in her coaching practice using IFS (Partswork) and Breathwork modalities with her clients to assist in healing and transforming their lives and relationships. With 10 years of study, she accredits her knowledge, to her passion to always know what is current in science and healing, and invests in herself and her business by taking courses and certifications to bring the best, most up to date information for her clients’ success. 

She has been divorced, married now for 5 years, has 7 children combined, and one grand baby. She loves the sun, playing board games with her kids, and learning everything about Nervous System Healing. 

In this episode, Betrayal Trauma, Relationship Boundaries, and Using Parts Work to Heal with Roxanne Kennedy Granata, we cover:

• Roxanne’s story of discovering her first husband’s addiction + the powerful healing journey and new career that happened for her as a result
• Learning to set boundaries and surrender the outcome, no matter how scary or out of control it feels like
• A massive trigger response that left Roxanne feeling like she was crazy, and how this ultimately led to her idea for her book
• Key differences of standard talk therapy vs. EMDR 
• The power of Partswork (IFS) therapy + what it’s like to actually find and ‘talk’ to a part of you that needs healing
• Understanding that having awareness and being very intentional about the ‘work’ you’re doing will positively impact and heal your kids + future generations
• How Roxanne coaches her clients when they’re experiencing difficulty or hardships in their relationships
• Realizing that it’s not about fixing every aspect of your life, but instead, fixing and healing YOU
• Imagining a ‘container’ in your mind that that allows you to gather everything that is bothering you, and then throw it in this container
• The confidence, security, and authenticity Roxanne found on the other side of her divorce + why everything really does work out when you heal yourself
• Being very present with yourself in order to understand every part of you, and what you truly need

Resources & Links:

• Altogether You by Jenna Riemersma
• Gather in Growth Sponsorship Inquiry
• More info on the Ignite + Grow Micromind
• Join the Ignite + Grow Micromind waitlist
• Learn more about my speaking
• Get your YouDoYou32 tracker! (82’s little sister!)
• Get your YouDoYou82 tracker and join the Facebook community!
• Gather in Growth podcast produced by: Jill Carr Podcasting

Connect with Roxanne:

• Follow on Instagram 
• Check out her website
• Listen to her podcast Choose In
• Get her book Cutting Ties: Healing from Betrayal Trauma as the Spouse of an Addict

Connect with Emily:

• Follow on Instagram and Facebook
• Join my email list
• Check out my website
• Connect with on LinkedIn

Related Episodes:

• Episode 038 | Using EFT Tapping to Get Out of Your Own Way with Theresa Lear Levine
• Episode 078 | What’s Fueling Our Perfectionism and Fear of Failure?

More about Gather in Growth podcast: 

Where can I connect with fellow rural women who aren’t afraid to dream big dreams? How do I create and sustain daily habits that help me reach my personal and professional goals? Am I the only one that absolutely loves living in the middle of nowhere but wants to understand the world beyond my backyard? What should I do about the unshakable feeling that there’s more to life than just showing up? How do I break free from other people’s opinions and confidently live as my authentic self? 

Welcome to Gather in Growth, a show created for passionate, growth-focused rural women like you. From mindset work and building strong habits to nerding out over personal growth books through the lens of life on a backroad, this is a show to leave you feeling joyful, inspired, ready to take action, and a little less alone. 

Tune in for honest and heart-felt conversations with host, Emily Reuschel, and fellow thought leaders, to talk about personal growth and thriving as a rural woman. Here you’ll gain tactical strategies to bring your dreams to reality, real talk about the ups and downs of tackling goals, meaningful insight from fresh perspectives, and the confidence to step into the calling that’s been laid on your heart for a reason. If you crave to feel seen in a small town, you’re in the right place. 

Whether you’re currently running on a backroad, shuffling kids to town, hopping along for a tractor ride, or three loads deep into folding laundry… we’re in this together. Absolutely anything is possible and I’m so grateful to be on this journey with YOU! 

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